Richard writes:
Bob: I’m so sorry about the death of that young lady. May light perpetual shine upon her.
You write: “When death comes like this, I feel the sting and the failure. It’s like somehow I failed almost…” I don’t know if every minister feels like this, Bob, but I know I do and often. “Failure” is a constant companion. People leave the church and I feel like I’ve failed. Visitors come once or twice and are never seen again and I feel like I’ve failed. I deal often with people who are intent on ruining their lives with drugs or alcohol and when they go right ahead and do just that I feel like I’ve failed. I spend time with people who go on to drift away from the faith and I feel like I’ve failed. Our church is no bigger today than it was 10 years ago and I feel like I’ve failed. I pray for sick people without results but if Benny Hinn comes to the city they’ll be real excited about that because, you know, Benny’s got the anointing and his prayers will be effective. FAIL!
I’ll soon enter my 50th year and I carry with me this low-grade sense of ministerial failure. Don’t know what to do about that. Trying to counter it by a recitation of my “successes” would be even more toxic. It’s part of the package. I’ll just have to trust a Saviour whose life on that fateful Friday looked like a failure and know that His strength is made perfect in weakness.
