"Where's the kaboom? There was supposed to be an earth-shattering kaboom?" –Marvin Martian

I’m being sarcastic about not knowing things, but I’m serious about not updating the liturgy.

And then you go on to admit that there have been changes since then. I don’t find the Orthodox claim, “We never change the liturgy, except when we do, but those changes aren’t real changes, so they don’t count,” to be particularly compelling. And of course, admitting that the Church had a dynamic liturgical tradition for hundreds of years after Christ completely undermines the Orthodox argument for a static liturgy (Cyril of Jerusalem’s innovations are especially well-documented), as you are admitting that extreme liturgical conservatism is itself an innovation occurring many generations after the last apostle died.